Happy Wrestling

Charlie Sheen is basically nuts, but it's hard not to look away. It seems each day Charlie Sheen doles another nugget of wisdom. Between his daily media appearances, it's hard to keep track of all the best Charlie Sheen quotes.

Sheen's pithy bon mots may never end up being embroidered on someone's throw pillow, but these Charlie Sheen quotes certainly are memorable:

I’m not bi-polar, “I’m bi-winning. I win here and I win there.”

"I'm tired of pretending I'm not special. I'm tired of pretending I'm not a total bitchin' rock star from Mars."

"I'm on a drug. It's called Charlie Sheen. It's not available because if you try it you will die. Your face will melt off and your children will weep over your exploded body."

"It's been a tsunami of media and I've been riding it on a mercury surfboard."

"Clearly I have defeated this earthworm with my words - imagine what I would have done with my fire breathing fists." - referring to the show's producer.

"I'm proud of what I created. Why wouldn't I be? I exposed people to magic. I exposed them to something that they otherwise would not see in their boring normal lives. And I gave that to them!"

"Resentments are the rocket fuel that lives in the tip of my saber."

"I got magic and I got poetry at my fingertips."

"People can't figure me out, they can't process me, I don't expect them to. You can't process me with the normal brain."

"I violently hate Chaim Levine. He's a stupid, stupid little man."

"I'm an F-18 bro and I will destroy you in the air and deploy my ordnance to the ground."

"I gracefully ignored this folly for 177 shows...I fire back once and this contaminated little maggot can't handle my power and can't handle the truth."

"I feel more alive, I feel more focused, I feel more energetic. I'm on a quest to claim absolute victory on every front."

"Everybody thinks I should be, like, begging for my job back. And I'm just going to forewarn them that it's everybody else that's going to be begging me for their job back."

“I tried marriage. I'm 0 for 3 with the marriage thing. So, being a ballplayer -- I believe in numbers. I'm not going 0 for 4. I'm not wearing a golden sombrero."

“AA was written for normal people. People that don’t have tiger blood and Adonis DNA,” “[I survived drug addiction] because I'm me. I'm different. I have a different constitution, I have a different brain, I have a different heart. I got tiger blood, man.”

"Dying is for fools. Amateurs."

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